I hate when opera plays on the classical music radio station. I realize that singing operatically takes a lot of talent, but I feel like I can do a pretty spot-on impression with absolutely no opera training. It just sounds fake and goofy and I'd rather hear violins. Yes, this somewhat-cellist is saying she'd rather hear violins. VIOLINS! That's saying something.
I also hate when people take three minutes to cross the street. It's one thing if you are old. I don't mind that. But when you are young, and just taking your sweet time to hustle your bustle, I think you've probably forgotten that I'm driving a car and could crush your body with it if I was impatient enough.
Last night, I made broccoli soup. I started by making vegetable stock, so the whole soup was really homemade. Unfortunately, when I had planned to make supper be soup and grilled cheese, I didn't realize that the recipe I had was for just broccoli soup and not broccoli cheese soup. This was worrisome for me because Ben is not a huge fan of any soup, but especially not brothy soup. But I had already decided to make it, so I went ahead making stock and then soup. It turned out pretty good, and Ben liked it. He gave me a back rub for doing dishes and making supper. If only everyone were that appreciative when I gave them food!
I painted my nails last night. It's been years since I've painted my own fingernails. I didn't do too poor of a job, but it's not perfect. They are green. And then I accidentally dropped the brush and it landed on Brody's head... oops. I got most of it out with some soap and water. He wasn't too pleased, but he forgave me. And he didn't even notice the nail polish, so that's good.
Speaking of Brody, the other day when I was sure my period would be starting at any moment, I didn't feel like going into the bathroom to see if it had started yet, so I just peeked into my underwear. I looked up and Brody was sitting on the bed staring at me with wide eyes. Awkward.
I guess I "lost" my nanny job. The husband started having seizures every week and cannot travel, so the wife isn't going to travel either. I am sad about it. After his first seizure, he hadn't had one in six or seven months... I hope everything is okay. He loves his little boy a lot and I'd hate for Spencer to grow up without his daddy.
The film challenge is this weekend. It is going to be a challenge because I work every day of it. I did call off Saturday, but she accidentally gave me last Saturday off instead of this one, and then no one could work my shift. But I did get someone to cover the first three hours of it, thank God. I guess I should have just called off Friday, too. Oh well.
Wednesday, October 19, 2011
Saturday, September 24, 2011
talkin bout my generation
I think that our generation is just better at rolling with the punches. I mean, we grew up with 9/11 (and as much as one might hate to admit it, it did affect us), we've seen the price of candy bars go from 50 cents to $1.09 (and the price of gas from I can't even remember to over $4.00), technology development and use went from little to everything, the recession was in full swing for most of us before or shortly after we entered the work force. We're a generation of an unstable world, one that hasn't stood still for a second. So while older people continue to evaluate the recession, fearing for their jobs, we evolve. We don't feel the drive to get a nine to five job. We find creative ways to make money and stick to a budget that we've never known not to stick to, and might not even be consciously aware of having. Because when you've grown up in an unstable world, you learn to wiggle with it. I think older generations need to learn from this. How many stories have I seen about someone who has been laid off and has been unemployed for several months? It's called looking for a job not in your field. Wiggle with it. It might not pay as much, but money is money, honey.
I wonder what kids now will be like when they're our age. I wonder what kids, who like the one I nanny, are constantly surrounded by technology, already know how to use an iPad at 15 months old, will be like.
I wonder what kids now will be like when they're our age. I wonder what kids, who like the one I nanny, are constantly surrounded by technology, already know how to use an iPad at 15 months old, will be like.
Wednesday, September 14, 2011
this day
Today I'm feeling very good about life.
Maybe it is because
-it is a beautiful day, cold like fall, but sunny
-I have the day off
-the sky is bluuuueeee with some clouds which drift in and out, like in minecraft (ok so, this is like the first reason...)
-I have to work tomorrow, and then I get to have four days off, go to one of my past homes, see some family (only in-laws lol), and see Maggie!
-I'm not pregnant
-I'm sitting in a cafe in one of the prettiest parts of the city, in my opinion
-I'm with my husband, and soon my sister
-Minecraft updated today, a huge update we've (as in everyone who plays the game) been anxiously awaiting
-I get to use Charlie, the new computer Ben and I got, to play said updated Minecraft, which makes it even more exciting because I can play the game on "render distance far," which means that I actually get to see!!!
-I don't have to keep Charlie plugged in all the time
-I don't care about not having a plan for life, not that I cared before. But for some reason I feel really good about it today. Free. Able to do fucking anything. It's like I have the whole world in my hands. A world of possibilities. Boom.
So that's why it's a good day :)
Maybe it is because
-it is a beautiful day, cold like fall, but sunny
-I have the day off
-the sky is bluuuueeee with some clouds which drift in and out, like in minecraft (ok so, this is like the first reason...)
-I have to work tomorrow, and then I get to have four days off, go to one of my past homes, see some family (only in-laws lol), and see Maggie!
-I'm not pregnant
-I'm sitting in a cafe in one of the prettiest parts of the city, in my opinion
-I'm with my husband, and soon my sister
-Minecraft updated today, a huge update we've (as in everyone who plays the game) been anxiously awaiting
-I get to use Charlie, the new computer Ben and I got, to play said updated Minecraft, which makes it even more exciting because I can play the game on "render distance far," which means that I actually get to see!!!
-I don't have to keep Charlie plugged in all the time
-I don't care about not having a plan for life, not that I cared before. But for some reason I feel really good about it today. Free. Able to do fucking anything. It's like I have the whole world in my hands. A world of possibilities. Boom.
So that's why it's a good day :)
Monday, September 12, 2011
timing
Present, past, future. The order in which I think. This is probably aided by the fact that I don't know my schedule on a week-to-week basis that far ahead of time. And because I know that I won't be working at Panera for the rest of my life (let's hope) but I don't know what's next.
But I have been thinking about "the future" lately. About what I want to do. I guess my main "problem" is that I don't want to be a literary scholar, which is a large part of what my degree prepared me for. I'd rather work in the creative parts. Creative writing or journalism, which I'm not as "well-trained" for. For which I am not as "well-trained." So... the future could include getting more training in one of those fields. Or maybe something completely different.
When I was still in high school, I entertained the thought of being a nurse. I like to help people, and what profession does so more than nursing? So... I might go back to school to be a nurse. Someday. Probably when Ben is done with his masters. Complete change...
And I still wonder if I wasted my money going to college. I know that I got a lot of good experiences from it. Friends, plays, band, intellectual growth, etc. But I am at the exact same point as I would have been if I had gone straight from high school into the work force. Except poorer, having spent all that money on my education and not earning any, save for a few meager dollars in the summer months. And more jaded, knowing that I could be, and should be, doing much, much more with my life. And more enriched from higher education, yes, but that plays into the poorer and jaded parts.
But... you know, for all the complaining I do, I'm not that unhappy. In fact, the only time I feel unhappy is when it's really busy at work when it shouldn't be, like at 3:00 pm- it just shouldn't be busy in between lunch and dinner. I don't know why it makes me so angry, but it does. Or like 10 minutes before close. That's just inconsiderate. Especially if you are ordering a lot of food and planning on eating it inside the restaurant. But other than that, I like my life a lot. I get days off in the middle of the week, which is super nice because everyone else is working! I don't have any serious commitment to my job, other than the fact that I want to keep it for the moneys, so I don't take my work home with me that much. I come home to loving husband. I live close to my sister. I have plenty of things to occupy my free time, although sometimes I forget that. And etc.
But I have been thinking about "the future" lately. About what I want to do. I guess my main "problem" is that I don't want to be a literary scholar, which is a large part of what my degree prepared me for. I'd rather work in the creative parts. Creative writing or journalism, which I'm not as "well-trained" for. For which I am not as "well-trained." So... the future could include getting more training in one of those fields. Or maybe something completely different.
When I was still in high school, I entertained the thought of being a nurse. I like to help people, and what profession does so more than nursing? So... I might go back to school to be a nurse. Someday. Probably when Ben is done with his masters. Complete change...
And I still wonder if I wasted my money going to college. I know that I got a lot of good experiences from it. Friends, plays, band, intellectual growth, etc. But I am at the exact same point as I would have been if I had gone straight from high school into the work force. Except poorer, having spent all that money on my education and not earning any, save for a few meager dollars in the summer months. And more jaded, knowing that I could be, and should be, doing much, much more with my life. And more enriched from higher education, yes, but that plays into the poorer and jaded parts.
But... you know, for all the complaining I do, I'm not that unhappy. In fact, the only time I feel unhappy is when it's really busy at work when it shouldn't be, like at 3:00 pm- it just shouldn't be busy in between lunch and dinner. I don't know why it makes me so angry, but it does. Or like 10 minutes before close. That's just inconsiderate. Especially if you are ordering a lot of food and planning on eating it inside the restaurant. But other than that, I like my life a lot. I get days off in the middle of the week, which is super nice because everyone else is working! I don't have any serious commitment to my job, other than the fact that I want to keep it for the moneys, so I don't take my work home with me that much. I come home to loving husband. I live close to my sister. I have plenty of things to occupy my free time, although sometimes I forget that. And etc.
Wednesday, September 7, 2011
smh...
Sometimes I think the worst thing about working in the food service industry is seeing how much food people waste. They just leave half a salad uneaten on their table and leave. Can't even bother to throw it away themselves.
But today, it was worse. Some lady ordered a you-pick-two with a Caesar salad and chicken noodle soup. A few minutes later, she comes up and says that she needs to exchange it because she doesn't like it. Last I checked, restaurants sort of have a no return policy. But of course, I have to do what she asks. Plus the cashier told her to tell me to do it. This bothers me a lot because A) it is such a simple meal- not a lot of flavor or at least not a lot of unexpected and/or strange ones; B) she chose to order it, how can she not like it; C) how can she not feel guilty about wasting an entire meal (seriously, like one bite missing) when so many people in the world, and even this city, can't afford to eat every day, let alone at Panera? And okay, what do I expect her to do? She just spent at least 7 dollars on food she doesn't like. But, can't you just suffer through the meal and know for next time not to order that? It's not like the food is bad. Nothing we serve is disgusting. It's all eatable. Or edible, whatever. Or hell, she could have just exchanged half of it, replacing either the salad or the soup, instead of both! Does it make me a bad person to judge this woman? Maybe. But... just saying from the numerous people who search for food in our dumpsters, she's being a little.... self-centered.
But today, it was worse. Some lady ordered a you-pick-two with a Caesar salad and chicken noodle soup. A few minutes later, she comes up and says that she needs to exchange it because she doesn't like it. Last I checked, restaurants sort of have a no return policy. But of course, I have to do what she asks. Plus the cashier told her to tell me to do it. This bothers me a lot because A) it is such a simple meal- not a lot of flavor or at least not a lot of unexpected and/or strange ones; B) she chose to order it, how can she not like it; C) how can she not feel guilty about wasting an entire meal (seriously, like one bite missing) when so many people in the world, and even this city, can't afford to eat every day, let alone at Panera? And okay, what do I expect her to do? She just spent at least 7 dollars on food she doesn't like. But, can't you just suffer through the meal and know for next time not to order that? It's not like the food is bad. Nothing we serve is disgusting. It's all eatable. Or edible, whatever. Or hell, she could have just exchanged half of it, replacing either the salad or the soup, instead of both! Does it make me a bad person to judge this woman? Maybe. But... just saying from the numerous people who search for food in our dumpsters, she's being a little.... self-centered.
Sunday, August 21, 2011
where i'm going
I know the person that I want to be. It's so refreshing! And I know that it will take a while for me to get all the way there, but I know the direction.
So... I want to make my own food. My own bread, my own tortillas, my own hummus, my own black bean burgers, my own soup, etc. I don't want to have to rely on prepackaged, preservative-ridden, store bought foods. Well, you know... the finished products of food. I'll still have to buy the "raw" materials, such as flour.
I also want to grow what I can of my own food-- vegetables, herbs. That part will take a while since I don't have any growing space, though I suppose I could do some small things. Someday, when Ben and I get a house, I want my yard to be a garden, a field. No grass. Just things that I can harvest, or enjoy looking at (flowers, etc).
And... the final thing, which I am going to begin implementing as soon as I finish off the sandwich meat in my fridge... I'm going to be what I'm calling an at-home vegetarian. Which means that I am not going to be buying or preparing meat in my kitchen. If someone is offering me a meal which has meat in it, I will gladly eat it. If I go out to a restaurant and I want meat, I will not be ashamed to order it. And I'm doing this not because I'm one of those crazy vegetarian types, but for the environment. Livestock production apparently is responsible for 18 percent of worldwide greenhouse gas emissions, so if fatty Americans, who consume waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay too much meat, would cut meat out of their diet for even one day a week, the world would become a much better place and probably die a little less soon than on the track it is heading now. Of course, meat being expensive and me liking animals plays into the decision, but the environment impact of meat is just... sickening. So, I'm going to do my part, because I like Earth.
So, I'm kind of a hippie. So what? If I had any sewing skills, I'd make my own clothes, too.
So... I want to make my own food. My own bread, my own tortillas, my own hummus, my own black bean burgers, my own soup, etc. I don't want to have to rely on prepackaged, preservative-ridden, store bought foods. Well, you know... the finished products of food. I'll still have to buy the "raw" materials, such as flour.
I also want to grow what I can of my own food-- vegetables, herbs. That part will take a while since I don't have any growing space, though I suppose I could do some small things. Someday, when Ben and I get a house, I want my yard to be a garden, a field. No grass. Just things that I can harvest, or enjoy looking at (flowers, etc).
And... the final thing, which I am going to begin implementing as soon as I finish off the sandwich meat in my fridge... I'm going to be what I'm calling an at-home vegetarian. Which means that I am not going to be buying or preparing meat in my kitchen. If someone is offering me a meal which has meat in it, I will gladly eat it. If I go out to a restaurant and I want meat, I will not be ashamed to order it. And I'm doing this not because I'm one of those crazy vegetarian types, but for the environment. Livestock production apparently is responsible for 18 percent of worldwide greenhouse gas emissions, so if fatty Americans, who consume waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay too much meat, would cut meat out of their diet for even one day a week, the world would become a much better place and probably die a little less soon than on the track it is heading now. Of course, meat being expensive and me liking animals plays into the decision, but the environment impact of meat is just... sickening. So, I'm going to do my part, because I like Earth.
So, I'm kind of a hippie. So what? If I had any sewing skills, I'd make my own clothes, too.
The nanny
So... nannied this week. It was ok. Kinda weird because the dad was with almost the whole time. He had a seizure for some unknown reason and he hit his head during it, so he is unable to care for his son completely. He isn't supposed to hold him and he has lapses in memory. He is a very interesting guy, and he really loves his son. The baby is 15 months old, but is pretty small because he was born prematurely. He is not too fussy, which is super nice. And I think he's pretty smart. And cute. So, the family is from Tennessee, but currently stays in Cincinnati, and the mom has to come to Omaha to do training with ConAgra.
The first day, dad (Jimmy), baby, and I walked around the Old Market. Jimmy likes old architecture and taking photos, so he really enjoyed it. Baby fell asleep almost as soon as we started walking. He is soooo cute when he sleeps- both oh his hands under his head and his elbows out. Like a cool guy who's relaxing. Then I had to go work at Panera.
The second day, we went to Borders and then to Sears. (At Borders I was naughty and bought 3 books and a journal. Two of my books were cookbooks.) Jimmy likes to get out and do things, but it wears him out a lot. We ate lunch at my Panera. Then I had to go work there.
The third day, we went swimming! Baby loves the water :) and then Jimmy rested because he was not feeling well. He told me before he went into the other room that I might have to take him to the hospital because his doctors told him that if he has to take 5 pills or if he starts to lose his vision he needs to go to the hospital. Apparently he had already taken 4 and his vision was acting funny. Baby and I played while Jimmy rested and when baby's nap time came, I put him in the stroller and walked to Red Mango, which was just down the block from the hotel, so that I could have some delicious and he could sleep. We came back and I transferred him into the crib. Then Jimmy came out and was ravenous from his medication so we ate leftover Chinese food for lunch, but it woke the baby up in the process. He'd only been asleep for an hour, and was not ready to be awake... very cranky. After he ate, Jimmy laid down with him to get him back to sleep. They slept for like 4 hours! It was glorious! I napped a little and read a lot. And then I had to go work at Panera
The fourth day, Jimmy had to fly home because his grandpa had died. That left baby and me alone for most of the day. I didn't really want to go anywhere because it looked like it could rain, and I didn't really know where to go anyway. At his nap time, I laid down with him and it was soooo cute!!! He cuddled up next to me and spooned with me. So adorable. He fell asleep almost immediately, and I slept for like half an hour, and then I moved him into the crib. I read for a little and watched some TV. He woke up and I didn't think he had been sleeping for long enough, and indeed he hadn't. I brought him to the couch and he laid down with me and fell asleep again. I didn't want him in that room, so I tried to move him to the crib, but he woke up again. Very cranky. We laid down in the bed where he cried for a little bit but then fell asleep. I just left him there because I did not want to wake him up again ayyyyy! He woke up and a little while after it stormed pretty severely. He didn't seem to notice though. I was keeping an eye on the news and the sky. It even hailed. Mom got back late because of the weather. And when I got back to my apartment on the first night that I didn't have to go to work at Panera, the power was out. I was furious. Tired, hungry, and overworked.
On the last day, it was just me and baby again. My power was still out in the morning so I couldn't make my much needed coffee. I was a little out of it. We ate breakfast downstairs and I got some there, thank god. But when we got back to the room, I was still just very tired. So I watched some TV while he played. I felt a little guilty, like I should be interacting with him the whole time. But that gets boring after a little while because he only had a few toys since they flew in and he's not a great conversationalist. But don't worry, when he was in to watching the TV, I changed it to PBS. I also felt a little guilty because Jimmy doesn't like him watching too much TV. Wants his brain stimulated and such. Oh well. It was a short day because they had a 3:00 flight and I was so glad to come home to an apartment with power and to a husband whom I hadn't seen in years! Or so it felt.
So... I like the kid. Overall, it is easy, but kinda boring. Except when Jimmy is there making us go do things. It's so weird, playing this strange, adult version of house. A man, a woman, and a baby. I wonder how many people think that we are a family. I know some people do, and who can blame them?
It was an exhausting week, overall. I worked somewhere around 77 hours Saturday through Friday. And my schedule at Panera changed, so now I have to work Saturday through Thursday without a day off. UCK.
And... nothing else is on my mind. :'( hate weeks like that XP
The first day, dad (Jimmy), baby, and I walked around the Old Market. Jimmy likes old architecture and taking photos, so he really enjoyed it. Baby fell asleep almost as soon as we started walking. He is soooo cute when he sleeps- both oh his hands under his head and his elbows out. Like a cool guy who's relaxing. Then I had to go work at Panera.
The second day, we went to Borders and then to Sears. (At Borders I was naughty and bought 3 books and a journal. Two of my books were cookbooks.) Jimmy likes to get out and do things, but it wears him out a lot. We ate lunch at my Panera. Then I had to go work there.
The third day, we went swimming! Baby loves the water :) and then Jimmy rested because he was not feeling well. He told me before he went into the other room that I might have to take him to the hospital because his doctors told him that if he has to take 5 pills or if he starts to lose his vision he needs to go to the hospital. Apparently he had already taken 4 and his vision was acting funny. Baby and I played while Jimmy rested and when baby's nap time came, I put him in the stroller and walked to Red Mango, which was just down the block from the hotel, so that I could have some delicious and he could sleep. We came back and I transferred him into the crib. Then Jimmy came out and was ravenous from his medication so we ate leftover Chinese food for lunch, but it woke the baby up in the process. He'd only been asleep for an hour, and was not ready to be awake... very cranky. After he ate, Jimmy laid down with him to get him back to sleep. They slept for like 4 hours! It was glorious! I napped a little and read a lot. And then I had to go work at Panera
The fourth day, Jimmy had to fly home because his grandpa had died. That left baby and me alone for most of the day. I didn't really want to go anywhere because it looked like it could rain, and I didn't really know where to go anyway. At his nap time, I laid down with him and it was soooo cute!!! He cuddled up next to me and spooned with me. So adorable. He fell asleep almost immediately, and I slept for like half an hour, and then I moved him into the crib. I read for a little and watched some TV. He woke up and I didn't think he had been sleeping for long enough, and indeed he hadn't. I brought him to the couch and he laid down with me and fell asleep again. I didn't want him in that room, so I tried to move him to the crib, but he woke up again. Very cranky. We laid down in the bed where he cried for a little bit but then fell asleep. I just left him there because I did not want to wake him up again ayyyyy! He woke up and a little while after it stormed pretty severely. He didn't seem to notice though. I was keeping an eye on the news and the sky. It even hailed. Mom got back late because of the weather. And when I got back to my apartment on the first night that I didn't have to go to work at Panera, the power was out. I was furious. Tired, hungry, and overworked.
On the last day, it was just me and baby again. My power was still out in the morning so I couldn't make my much needed coffee. I was a little out of it. We ate breakfast downstairs and I got some there, thank god. But when we got back to the room, I was still just very tired. So I watched some TV while he played. I felt a little guilty, like I should be interacting with him the whole time. But that gets boring after a little while because he only had a few toys since they flew in and he's not a great conversationalist. But don't worry, when he was in to watching the TV, I changed it to PBS. I also felt a little guilty because Jimmy doesn't like him watching too much TV. Wants his brain stimulated and such. Oh well. It was a short day because they had a 3:00 flight and I was so glad to come home to an apartment with power and to a husband whom I hadn't seen in years! Or so it felt.
So... I like the kid. Overall, it is easy, but kinda boring. Except when Jimmy is there making us go do things. It's so weird, playing this strange, adult version of house. A man, a woman, and a baby. I wonder how many people think that we are a family. I know some people do, and who can blame them?
It was an exhausting week, overall. I worked somewhere around 77 hours Saturday through Friday. And my schedule at Panera changed, so now I have to work Saturday through Thursday without a day off. UCK.
And... nothing else is on my mind. :'( hate weeks like that XP
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